First thing Wednesday morning during my journaling, I was feeling sad. Checking in with that sadness I realized it was because I was tired and I was sad about being tired, even fatigued. It was 5 AM and I was to meet my biking buddies at 5:30. Did I text them and cancel? No, I went riding 1:15 and then running 45 min per my triathlon training plan. Later when I met my swim coach at the lake, she asked if I was alright. I answered that I was sad and tired. She said the most obvious thing that I have heard many times, but I still struggle to give myself permission to do, “Rest! Go home and take a nap and take 1-3 days off from all training load. And training load is not just affected by training, but by the travel you have been doing and the days at Tennessee Tech orientation with your son and the nights helping your daughter through her break-up. Those all count too.” I had never counted that before and even after all my recovery in Workaholics Anonymous, I still felt shame to stop and rest. Somehow, I felt not good enough if I could not keep up with it the way I thought it “should” be. I was glad to have a coach to tell me to stop and rest and that my training and fitness would actually be much better for it. And this morning, when I woke up with that same sadness as 4:45 I decided to sleep some more and not meet my friend to ride and did a much shorter ride later. Emotions are information. I have gotten good at noticing my emotions every morning and now I will start to listen to the information as well and to act on it instead of just noting it. Life is much better when I do.
What emotions are you not noticing? Or listening to them as well?
Have a great week!
Art
