Friday Reflections BLOG

What is value? What does it mean to be worthy? How much do I have to produce to be worthy? Do I have to earn value? Or rest? Or love? For most of my life I have thought I needed to earn value and love through productivity, doing, making money, and creating results. I didn’t think about this so much explicitly, but it was always running in the background and informed how I interacted with the world. Now, in this liminal space “between careers,” I struggle with this. Do I have value if don’t have a big career? If I am not running until I collapse in bed every day. I was discussing this with my Workaholics Anonymous sponsor, and

This has been an amazing week! So many gifts have been given to me. I am feeling completely grateful for the following gifts: Moving my son into a great university where he will be studying nursing. Getting a great offer on our farm we have on the market. Getting the opportunity to buy an Airstream with very favorable circumstances. Finding a lot with a fantastic view for future use. Participating in a half Ironman distance triathlon tomorrow. Starting new professional engagements, and most of all, having a great partner next to me that is as excited about all of it as I am. I am feeling truly blessed. Practicing letting go and letting God has brought me so much peace

This week has been hard. I have been tired and sad. When digging into the sadness it was coming from three things. Missing the purpose I found in my career. Being tired. And thinking about my middle son moving away to college next week. Being tired, I address much like last week by resting more, which worked great. And my son moving to college is a good sadness, as we have such a close relationship and I know this is the right step for him. There is a sweetness there. Nothing to fix or change at all. Missing my purpose has been a little tougher. My career made me feel special, different, interesting and I hate to admit it, a

I had an amazing day today! My brother and I went on a long run/hike up Santa Fe Mountain. There was so much beauty, starting in the desert and then rising up with pines and then high meadows filled with wild flowers and big aspens followed by fir forests with lush green understory. And the weather was perfect (on the way up) never above 65 degrees F. The trail was mostly rolling with some steep parts. I love running and I love the Rockies and I love my brother. It made for a great day. But where I found my #child-likejoy was when running down. There were many rolling parts that weren’t steep and had a flat or gently upslopes

Sometimes it’s worth doing something just to get over the fear of failure. I have had a love-hate relationship with writing these posts since I started. I love them when they are done, and I stress out thinking about doing them. Now I know why. I am afraid I will look stupid. They will be bad. I will #loseface. I will lose the good opinion of others. That is why it is so good for me to do them, to get over the #fearoffailure. As human beings, we are motivated much more by the fear of loosing something than by the anticipation of gaining something. Therefore, it is a good practice for me to get over that fear by putting

When I was feeling burned out in my job and got sick in 2020, I felt #isolated. I feared that if I said anything about, I would look like a failure, and I might even loose my job. I thought there was something uniquely wrong with me. Because of this, I felt I would lose friends and respect. While it is possible that I might lose some false friends or respect, this transition is definitely not unique to me. I am not alone. I started reading, From Strength to Strength, (I am not alone )this week. In it, Arthur (yes, it’s a good name?) C. Brooks, presents the data that EVERYONE’s #fluidintelligence, raw processing power, declines dramatically somewhere between 30

Which do you prefer? On the surface, I would take easy. But if I reflect a little deeper, I want a meaningful or purpose driven life. I am writing this from the Greek Island of Amorgos. I have really enjoyed running and hiking here this week. It is easy to see that life here for the locals is hard. Most of the handful of villages on this side of the island have no roads in them, only stairs leading to the homes. Everything is raised here or comes in on a ferry to this tiny port and they only got electrical service in 1983! Talking with the owner of the hotel, I got to see her answer to this question.

I have thought about this a lot in the last weeks as I have been training for a full IronMan and it has been VERY HOT in TN. I hear from some training partners about how they hate training when it’s so hot, or climbing big hills. I used to feel the same way, but now the heat is OK with me. I just accept it and go slower. I am training by heart rate anyway, so it really doesn’t make a big difference. Of course I go slower in the heat and up steep hills, but that is OK as long as I don’t have any #expectations about my speed. So it is not the heat or the hill

Last week was my first 100-mile bike ride. It was also my first time putting together an athletic event. When my friend @RobertTakla, said he was riding a century in every state and asked me to find him one in TN, I was happy to do so. When there weren’t any that fit his desire for a flat course, I decided to put one together. What surprised me what how much fun it was being #creative, coming up with a route, a T-Shirt design, timing, stops, etc. etc. It was #exciting even if I felt silly. Unlike a couple of years ago, I won’t let my critical thinking stop me from doing what inspires me. Instead of telling myself I

My middle son, Sawyer, graduated from Ravenwood High School last weekend. It was a joyous occasion! All 4 of his grandparents were there as well as other family members, his girlfriend, and friends. It is naturally a time of reflection as a parent. What struck me the most was all the different types of friends Sawyer has. All kinds of different looks, sizes, and interests attended his graduation party. And many friends stayed at his party for many hours, when there were dozens of such graduation parties going on at the same time. Why where they staying that long here? What is the common link between all these different types of people and my son? It hit me! It is

I have had so many good reminders of this recently. I will ask my son to do things 4 times in 4 different ways and it still is not done and my mind automatically goes to being critical. What’s wrong with him? He doesn’t care! He doesn’t respect me. That comes up for me a lot. I start to take it personally and be critical of him as a person. This week, I also reflected on the very deep conversation I had with my parents over Thanksgiving. This conversation was about some extremely difficult parts of my upbringing. What allowed me to have that conversation in a good and wholesome way and without anger, was months of therapy and working

Wow! What a wonderful and wild retreat I had the last weeks in the Rockies. First, I drove there on the back roads with NO time pressure and NO agenda. This relaxed drive was such a treat, especially the Ozarks and Route 66. I did all kinds of outdoor adventures that I love, skiing, hiking, snow shoeing, and biking. I drove through some of the most beautiful country there is. So, I bought a place and decide to never return to TN. (April Fools!) I did shop for real estate, Baja race my truck, spend great time with my middle son, my cousin and a friend, and a lot of great time alone! I thought that would be the hardest

In workaholics anonymous, I have learned that good enough is really good and much better than nothing. I had always believed the saying “If it is worth doing, it is worth doing right!” This actually blocked me from getting started. Actually, if it is worth doing, it is worth doing. Striving for perfection, or doing it right, often keeps us from doing anything. It blocks progress of any kind. The founders of AirBNB and NetFlix talk about taking the minimal viable action to get started. What is the one small step we can do now to see if this idea might work. It is not grandiose, sophisticated, or anywhere near perfect. I had a request for proposal of executive coaching

For years I have wanted to create space in my life. I even had several executive coaching sessions about it 7-8 years ago. I put a Post-It on my computer monitor to remind myself. A boss of mine even told me to not schedule every minute full, to have time for reflection and thinking. I didn’t listen. When I moved back from China, I did take some piano lessons and wrote a book, but it still wasn’t creating space, but filling the space with somethings other than work. I am finally starting to experience space! To have time to think and reflect. I woke up Monday morning with a good feeling but couldn’t put my finger on what it was.

What is value? What does it mean to be worthy? How much do I have to produce to be worthy? Do I have to earn value? Or rest? Or love? For most of my life I have thought I needed to earn value and love through productivity, doing, making money, and creating results. I didn’t think about this so much explicitly, but it was always running in the background and informed how I interacted with the world. Now, in this liminal space “between careers,” I struggle with this. Do I have value if don’t have a big career? If I am not running until I collapse in bed every day. I was discussing this with my Workaholics Anonymous sponsor, and

This has been an amazing week! So many gifts have been given to me. I am feeling completely grateful for the following gifts: Moving my son into a great university where he will be studying nursing. Getting a great offer on our farm we have on the market. Getting the opportunity to buy an Airstream with very favorable circumstances. Finding a lot with a fantastic view for future use. Participating in a half Ironman distance triathlon tomorrow. Starting new professional engagements, and most of all, having a great partner next to me that is as excited about all of it as I am. I am feeling truly blessed. Practicing letting go and letting God has brought me so much peace

This week has been hard. I have been tired and sad. When digging into the sadness it was coming from three things. Missing the purpose I found in my career. Being tired. And thinking about my middle son moving away to college next week. Being tired, I address much like last week by resting more, which worked great. And my son moving to college is a good sadness, as we have such a close relationship and I know this is the right step for him. There is a sweetness there. Nothing to fix or change at all. Missing my purpose has been a little tougher. My career made me feel special, different, interesting and I hate to admit it, a

I had an amazing day today! My brother and I went on a long run/hike up Santa Fe Mountain. There was so much beauty, starting in the desert and then rising up with pines and then high meadows filled with wild flowers and big aspens followed by fir forests with lush green understory. And the weather was perfect (on the way up) never above 65 degrees F. The trail was mostly rolling with some steep parts. I love running and I love the Rockies and I love my brother. It made for a great day. But where I found my #child-likejoy was when running down. There were many rolling parts that weren’t steep and had a flat or gently upslopes

Sometimes it’s worth doing something just to get over the fear of failure. I have had a love-hate relationship with writing these posts since I started. I love them when they are done, and I stress out thinking about doing them. Now I know why. I am afraid I will look stupid. They will be bad. I will #loseface. I will lose the good opinion of others. That is why it is so good for me to do them, to get over the #fearoffailure. As human beings, we are motivated much more by the fear of loosing something than by the anticipation of gaining something. Therefore, it is a good practice for me to get over that fear by putting

When I was feeling burned out in my job and got sick in 2020, I felt #isolated. I feared that if I said anything about, I would look like a failure, and I might even loose my job. I thought there was something uniquely wrong with me. Because of this, I felt I would lose friends and respect. While it is possible that I might lose some false friends or respect, this transition is definitely not unique to me. I am not alone. I started reading, From Strength to Strength, (I am not alone )this week. In it, Arthur (yes, it’s a good name?) C. Brooks, presents the data that EVERYONE’s #fluidintelligence, raw processing power, declines dramatically somewhere between 30

Which do you prefer? On the surface, I would take easy. But if I reflect a little deeper, I want a meaningful or purpose driven life. I am writing this from the Greek Island of Amorgos. I have really enjoyed running and hiking here this week. It is easy to see that life here for the locals is hard. Most of the handful of villages on this side of the island have no roads in them, only stairs leading to the homes. Everything is raised here or comes in on a ferry to this tiny port and they only got electrical service in 1983! Talking with the owner of the hotel, I got to see her answer to this question.

I have thought about this a lot in the last weeks as I have been training for a full IronMan and it has been VERY HOT in TN. I hear from some training partners about how they hate training when it’s so hot, or climbing big hills. I used to feel the same way, but now the heat is OK with me. I just accept it and go slower. I am training by heart rate anyway, so it really doesn’t make a big difference. Of course I go slower in the heat and up steep hills, but that is OK as long as I don’t have any #expectations about my speed. So it is not the heat or the hill

Last week was my first 100-mile bike ride. It was also my first time putting together an athletic event. When my friend @RobertTakla, said he was riding a century in every state and asked me to find him one in TN, I was happy to do so. When there weren’t any that fit his desire for a flat course, I decided to put one together. What surprised me what how much fun it was being #creative, coming up with a route, a T-Shirt design, timing, stops, etc. etc. It was #exciting even if I felt silly. Unlike a couple of years ago, I won’t let my critical thinking stop me from doing what inspires me. Instead of telling myself I

My middle son, Sawyer, graduated from Ravenwood High School last weekend. It was a joyous occasion! All 4 of his grandparents were there as well as other family members, his girlfriend, and friends. It is naturally a time of reflection as a parent. What struck me the most was all the different types of friends Sawyer has. All kinds of different looks, sizes, and interests attended his graduation party. And many friends stayed at his party for many hours, when there were dozens of such graduation parties going on at the same time. Why where they staying that long here? What is the common link between all these different types of people and my son? It hit me! It is

I have had so many good reminders of this recently. I will ask my son to do things 4 times in 4 different ways and it still is not done and my mind automatically goes to being critical. What’s wrong with him? He doesn’t care! He doesn’t respect me. That comes up for me a lot. I start to take it personally and be critical of him as a person. This week, I also reflected on the very deep conversation I had with my parents over Thanksgiving. This conversation was about some extremely difficult parts of my upbringing. What allowed me to have that conversation in a good and wholesome way and without anger, was months of therapy and working

Wow! What a wonderful and wild retreat I had the last weeks in the Rockies. First, I drove there on the back roads with NO time pressure and NO agenda. This relaxed drive was such a treat, especially the Ozarks and Route 66. I did all kinds of outdoor adventures that I love, skiing, hiking, snow shoeing, and biking. I drove through some of the most beautiful country there is. So, I bought a place and decide to never return to TN. (April Fools!) I did shop for real estate, Baja race my truck, spend great time with my middle son, my cousin and a friend, and a lot of great time alone! I thought that would be the hardest

In workaholics anonymous, I have learned that good enough is really good and much better than nothing. I had always believed the saying “If it is worth doing, it is worth doing right!” This actually blocked me from getting started. Actually, if it is worth doing, it is worth doing. Striving for perfection, or doing it right, often keeps us from doing anything. It blocks progress of any kind. The founders of AirBNB and NetFlix talk about taking the minimal viable action to get started. What is the one small step we can do now to see if this idea might work. It is not grandiose, sophisticated, or anywhere near perfect. I had a request for proposal of executive coaching

For years I have wanted to create space in my life. I even had several executive coaching sessions about it 7-8 years ago. I put a Post-It on my computer monitor to remind myself. A boss of mine even told me to not schedule every minute full, to have time for reflection and thinking. I didn’t listen. When I moved back from China, I did take some piano lessons and wrote a book, but it still wasn’t creating space, but filling the space with somethings other than work. I am finally starting to experience space! To have time to think and reflect. I woke up Monday morning with a good feeling but couldn’t put my finger on what it was.

What is value? What does it mean to be worthy? How much do I have to produce to be worthy? Do I have to earn value? Or rest? Or love? For most of my life I have thought I needed to earn value and love through productivity, doing, making money, and creating results. I didn’t think about this so much explicitly, but it was always running in the background and informed how I interacted with the world. Now, in this liminal space “between careers,” I struggle with this. Do I have value if don’t have a big career? If I am not running until I collapse in bed every day. I was discussing this with my Workaholics Anonymous sponsor, and

This has been an amazing week! So many gifts have been given to me. I am feeling completely grateful for the following gifts: Moving my son into a great university where he will be studying nursing. Getting a great offer on our farm we have on the market. Getting the opportunity to buy an Airstream with very favorable circumstances. Finding a lot with a fantastic view for future use. Participating in a half Ironman distance triathlon tomorrow. Starting new professional engagements, and most of all, having a great partner next to me that is as excited about all of it as I am. I am feeling truly blessed. Practicing letting go and letting God has brought me so much peace

This week has been hard. I have been tired and sad. When digging into the sadness it was coming from three things. Missing the purpose I found in my career. Being tired. And thinking about my middle son moving away to college next week. Being tired, I address much like last week by resting more, which worked great. And my son moving to college is a good sadness, as we have such a close relationship and I know this is the right step for him. There is a sweetness there. Nothing to fix or change at all. Missing my purpose has been a little tougher. My career made me feel special, different, interesting and I hate to admit it, a

I had an amazing day today! My brother and I went on a long run/hike up Santa Fe Mountain. There was so much beauty, starting in the desert and then rising up with pines and then high meadows filled with wild flowers and big aspens followed by fir forests with lush green understory. And the weather was perfect (on the way up) never above 65 degrees F. The trail was mostly rolling with some steep parts. I love running and I love the Rockies and I love my brother. It made for a great day. But where I found my #child-likejoy was when running down. There were many rolling parts that weren’t steep and had a flat or gently upslopes

Sometimes it’s worth doing something just to get over the fear of failure. I have had a love-hate relationship with writing these posts since I started. I love them when they are done, and I stress out thinking about doing them. Now I know why. I am afraid I will look stupid. They will be bad. I will #loseface. I will lose the good opinion of others. That is why it is so good for me to do them, to get over the #fearoffailure. As human beings, we are motivated much more by the fear of loosing something than by the anticipation of gaining something. Therefore, it is a good practice for me to get over that fear by putting

When I was feeling burned out in my job and got sick in 2020, I felt #isolated. I feared that if I said anything about, I would look like a failure, and I might even loose my job. I thought there was something uniquely wrong with me. Because of this, I felt I would lose friends and respect. While it is possible that I might lose some false friends or respect, this transition is definitely not unique to me. I am not alone. I started reading, From Strength to Strength, (I am not alone )this week. In it, Arthur (yes, it’s a good name?) C. Brooks, presents the data that EVERYONE’s #fluidintelligence, raw processing power, declines dramatically somewhere between 30

Which do you prefer? On the surface, I would take easy. But if I reflect a little deeper, I want a meaningful or purpose driven life. I am writing this from the Greek Island of Amorgos. I have really enjoyed running and hiking here this week. It is easy to see that life here for the locals is hard. Most of the handful of villages on this side of the island have no roads in them, only stairs leading to the homes. Everything is raised here or comes in on a ferry to this tiny port and they only got electrical service in 1983! Talking with the owner of the hotel, I got to see her answer to this question.

I have thought about this a lot in the last weeks as I have been training for a full IronMan and it has been VERY HOT in TN. I hear from some training partners about how they hate training when it’s so hot, or climbing big hills. I used to feel the same way, but now the heat is OK with me. I just accept it and go slower. I am training by heart rate anyway, so it really doesn’t make a big difference. Of course I go slower in the heat and up steep hills, but that is OK as long as I don’t have any #expectations about my speed. So it is not the heat or the hill

Last week was my first 100-mile bike ride. It was also my first time putting together an athletic event. When my friend @RobertTakla, said he was riding a century in every state and asked me to find him one in TN, I was happy to do so. When there weren’t any that fit his desire for a flat course, I decided to put one together. What surprised me what how much fun it was being #creative, coming up with a route, a T-Shirt design, timing, stops, etc. etc. It was #exciting even if I felt silly. Unlike a couple of years ago, I won’t let my critical thinking stop me from doing what inspires me. Instead of telling myself I

My middle son, Sawyer, graduated from Ravenwood High School last weekend. It was a joyous occasion! All 4 of his grandparents were there as well as other family members, his girlfriend, and friends. It is naturally a time of reflection as a parent. What struck me the most was all the different types of friends Sawyer has. All kinds of different looks, sizes, and interests attended his graduation party. And many friends stayed at his party for many hours, when there were dozens of such graduation parties going on at the same time. Why where they staying that long here? What is the common link between all these different types of people and my son? It hit me! It is

I have had so many good reminders of this recently. I will ask my son to do things 4 times in 4 different ways and it still is not done and my mind automatically goes to being critical. What’s wrong with him? He doesn’t care! He doesn’t respect me. That comes up for me a lot. I start to take it personally and be critical of him as a person. This week, I also reflected on the very deep conversation I had with my parents over Thanksgiving. This conversation was about some extremely difficult parts of my upbringing. What allowed me to have that conversation in a good and wholesome way and without anger, was months of therapy and working

Wow! What a wonderful and wild retreat I had the last weeks in the Rockies. First, I drove there on the back roads with NO time pressure and NO agenda. This relaxed drive was such a treat, especially the Ozarks and Route 66. I did all kinds of outdoor adventures that I love, skiing, hiking, snow shoeing, and biking. I drove through some of the most beautiful country there is. So, I bought a place and decide to never return to TN. (April Fools!) I did shop for real estate, Baja race my truck, spend great time with my middle son, my cousin and a friend, and a lot of great time alone! I thought that would be the hardest

In workaholics anonymous, I have learned that good enough is really good and much better than nothing. I had always believed the saying “If it is worth doing, it is worth doing right!” This actually blocked me from getting started. Actually, if it is worth doing, it is worth doing. Striving for perfection, or doing it right, often keeps us from doing anything. It blocks progress of any kind. The founders of AirBNB and NetFlix talk about taking the minimal viable action to get started. What is the one small step we can do now to see if this idea might work. It is not grandiose, sophisticated, or anywhere near perfect. I had a request for proposal of executive coaching

For years I have wanted to create space in my life. I even had several executive coaching sessions about it 7-8 years ago. I put a Post-It on my computer monitor to remind myself. A boss of mine even told me to not schedule every minute full, to have time for reflection and thinking. I didn’t listen. When I moved back from China, I did take some piano lessons and wrote a book, but it still wasn’t creating space, but filling the space with somethings other than work. I am finally starting to experience space! To have time to think and reflect. I woke up Monday morning with a good feeling but couldn’t put my finger on what it was.